A Simple Prairie Life

We have notified our agency we will be putting our adoption on hold.  It was already on hold for the most part due to the long wait the country was imposing.  Now, however, it is official.  We will tie up loose strings as far as our paper work is concerned and our file will be put on hold until further notice (or expiration) with the agency.

This was a VERY difficult decision to make.  This morning Randy called to let me know another major aircraft company in our area would be laying off 2,300 people Friday (plus 4,000 who were laid off at a different company last Friday).  This reassured us we were making the right decision and the email to the agency was sent.

We will see what happens in the months to come.

Randy and I had a moment of truth Thursday evening.  Long story short our I-600A had been sent to the wrong office so two weeks later we received it back (minus the $830 check) with the correct address to send it to.  Friday I called the bank and $25 later a stop payment was put on the check.  I believe in “signs,” things that are supposed to hint to you you may not be heading in the right direction in your life. 

Signs:

Nepal regulates number of adoptions to 10 per agency per year.  We are pushed back to 2010 at the earliest.

Nepal changes expiration dates increasing our expenses in the thousands.

Immigration paper work is returned to us, check is lost, delayed two weeks.

Missing paper work. 

Miscommunication.

Our health insurance changed from 80/20 to 50/50.

The economy is terrible.  Four thousand (plus) people were laid off from Cessna in Wichita Friday.  Four thousand people may be without and income, insurance, and even hope as of January 30.  Aviation is a scary industry to rely on and rely on it we do.

My job is contract with no promises of a permanent position in site. 

Parents are indifferent to the idea of adoption (or acquiring grandchildren in general).

My point is we have a lot of reasons to question our desire to adopt a child(ren).  As the expenses keep growing, the wait continues to increase, and the job market becomes even more unstable; we question our decision to start a family. 

We love the life we have.  We love each other and the time we spend together.  We love our animals and our little farm.  We don’t love our jobs and have always had dreams of retiring early and living off of what we could provide for ourselves or sell off of our farm. 

We have come to the conclusion we should appreciate what we have.  Enjoy each day and not try to plan our lives to the very end.  Our adoption is now on hold (so to speak) so we can have some time to reevaluate what we really want out of life. 

Our dreams involve traveling the world, retiring early, saving abandoned animals, taking care of our parents as they age, and taking care of each other.  We are not so sure we are willing to change all of those dreams just yet.  Selfish, maybe, but the world is a scary place right now.  We have always said we don’t want to bring a child into this world and now aren’t so sure we would like to raise one in it either.  We may change our minds later in life, but for now we just aren’t ready. 

Another thing we discussed last night is the idea of adoption as, “giving a child a better life.”  Okay, probably, but what about the fact they are stripped of their culture, their homeland, and their familiar surroundings.  Who are we as Americans to think this life if better than that of another countries.  Randy and I dream of a simple life which is the farthest thing from the reality of life in America where taxes (income, property, and otherwise) rule your life. 

To us, to live in a place without electricity means no electric bills.  To live in a place where there is not a Walmart on every corner means we can grow our own food in our garden and raise our own animals for dairy, meat, and eggs.  To live in a place where handmade goods are sold at markets means people still have skills and talents passed down from generation to generation.  Meals are prepared and eaten together as a family (did you know there are three of them). 

We dream of a life like this.  Americans tend to believe we are at the top of the food chain, pecking order, ladder, and every other proverbial list known to man.  If we take a step back we might just see our lack of life skills, dwindling family values, negligible respect for nature, discontentment about being “stuck” at home, our love affair with the ol’ mighty dollar, consumerism, and the list goes on and on.  It doesn’t make us the Land of the “Free.”  It makes us the land of the stressed, over worked, over taxed, never home, and stuck on a financial treadmill that beats the happiness right out of us. 

For now, we have decided to be free.  To attempt to live the life we always dreamed of, just the two of us (plus a small pack of dogs).  We hope to make plans to travel within our own borders and beyond.  We plan to hike through nature and mingle in the cities.  We plan to spend money and save money.  To pay off debt, save for early retirement, and become more self-sufficient and self-reliant. 

Most importantly, we plan to enjoy our lives while we are here on this Earth.

It wouldn’t be international adoption otherwise.  Nepal announced the following dossier documents are only valid for one year at which point they will have to be redone/renewed (cha-ching):

Home study

Police Clearance

Health Certificates

~Physical Assessment Letter and Examination form

~Psychological Assessment Letter

Consent letter from concerned Authority from the US (I-600 Approval)

Randy and I are just rolling with the punches.  So it’s going to take longer and cost more.  Who would have thought those would be the “unknowns” of a pioneer program.  haha!  As long as it all comes together in the end we probably won’t even remember all the bumps in the road.

Have a great weekend!

I just dropped our I-600A form in the mail to USCIS.  The wait time is estimated at 3 months, but we will keep our fingers crossed is soars through there faster than 3 months.

Although we will probably not make the 2009 process, we have hopes of being first in line for 2010. 

I will put the final touches on our dossier this weekend so the minute our I-600A is approved we can send our dossier to our agency.  Then, the ball will be in their court to get our dossier sent to Nepal when appropriate.  Hopefully in 2009, but more likely the beginning of 2010.

We were informed by our agency; Nepal will only accept 10 applications from each agency in 2009.  8 families have turned in their dossiers leaving only 2 places for 2009.  We were also informed the chance of us filling one of those places is slim to none. 

This is a little frustrating considering the agency (I feel) has know this for quite some time and withheld the information.  It would have been nice to know before we completed our home study a week ago. 

So, we will not even be able to send our dossier to Nepal until 2010.  Randy and I have gone over our options and have decided to stick it out and see how it goes.  If there are anymore “surprises” we may have to make some changes, but for now we will continue to ride it out.

Wish us luck!

We passed our home study.  Now we will wait for the official copy of our home study to file our I-600A.

I also faxed in our China Child of Promise paper work.  If a child from China becomes available who fits the minor/correctable needs list we filled out, there is a possibility we will be selected to adopt her before our Nepal adoption is complete.

For the I-600A we need:

1)  A letter to send our confirmation to Kathmandu, Nepal-print with current date

2)  A Check ($670 =$80 each=$830)-write check

3)  Certified Birth Certificates

4)  Certified Marriage Certificate

*A self-addressed, pre-paid mailer and a not requestion certificate return.

6)  Original (signed and notarized) home study

We are waiting for our home study and then we will send off our I-600A.  The wait time is currently listed at 3 months.  So, it will be 3 months before we can send in our dossier.  Hurry up and wait!